I watch porn for the storyline
how am i suppose to explain to my child that there are straight people
IM LAUGHIGN SO HARD
MY GREAT AUNT FRIENDED SOMEONE WITH THE SMAE NAME AS ME ON FACEBOOK THINKING IT WAS ME
the girld idnt even question it ic ant breathe
the slow but inevitable decline of one joseph trohman
i would hit this car without even thinking about it
I saw this post in Facebook with the caption “apparently Mac supports windows” and I cried
They can leap 36 feet
As in leap forward 36 feet
They don’t jump 36 feet into the fucking sky do you know how terrifying that would be the human race wouldn’t have survived because we’d have all had heart attacks while still in Africa
I just spent two minutes laughing harder at this than I probably should have.
IM WHEEZING SO HARD OMG
this is one of those things that always makes me wheeze
This man is just like traumatized for life like-
He has to go into counseling for this
His family and friends and even coworkers feel alienated
“Henry we talked about this-“
“HE TOOK THE ICE CREAM WITH HIS HANDS”
“Henry that’s what he’s supposed to do-“
“I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY HE ORDERED A CONE IF HE WAS JUST GONNA TAKE THE ICE CREAM-“
“If he gave you the money that’s what he’s supposed to d-“
“A CUP IS 50 CENTS CHEAPER”
He never has healthy relationships with anyone ever again.
His life has been defined by this moment.
This poor guy
reblogging for the flawless commentary
ITS ON MY DASH AGAIN YES.
|—||Hanif Kureishi, Intimacy (via winterkristall)|